I know I am undeserving of your bounty; but if I were to tell you what hardships I have undergone—to what frightful extremities I have been reduced—and to what infamy I have submitted, to earn a scanty subsistence for this child's sake, —if you could feel what it is to stand alone in the world as I do, bereft of all who have ever loved me, and shunned by all who have ever known me, except the worthless and the wretched,—if you knew (and Heaven grant you may be spared the knowledge!) how much affliction sharpens love, and how much more dear to me my child has become for every sacrifice I have made for him,—if you were told all this, you would, I am sure, pity rather than reproach me, because I cannot at once consent to a separation, which I feel would break my heart. Will you please—Not now, or I must go. He would get her to come to tea with him, usually in a pleasant tea-room over a fruit-shop in Tottenham Court Road, and he would discuss his own point of view and hint at a thousand devotions were she but to command him. His grip twisted her wrist. Even the chattering monkeys, parrots, and parrakeets departed the fruit groves for the smelly dark of the jungle. The popcorn dwindled to a half a bucket, his heart settled into its normal routine. She opened the door with a neon colored key. In all these weeks she had not once knelt to pray. By a tacit agreement they ignored the significant thing between them, ignored the slipping away of the ground on which they had stood together hitherto. To fight inertia on the one hand and to study this queer girl on the other. After he had endured this torture for an hour, at a sign from Wild another hundred weight was added. His great personal strength being so well known, it was deemed prudent by Marvel to have all the four partners, together with Caliban, in attendance.
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