“Dear friend,” she said, “this is a matter which you must leave to me to do as I think best. This roof is still open to you. The fire—if there was any in him—never made headway against this insistant demand to know the significance of these manifold inward agitations. Every slight action is influenced by what he imagines would be the opinion of other people. His efforts at self-destruction were, however, prevented. Perhaps this was the real turning point: the hour in which the disordered mind began permanently to readjust itself. My mind is full of ideas and images that I have been cherishing and accumulating—dreams of travelling side by side, of lunching quietly together in some jolly restaurant, of moonlight and music and all that side of life, of seeing you dressed like a queen and shining in some brilliant throng—mine; of your looking at flowers in some old-world garden, our garden—there are splendid places to be got down in Surrey, and a little runabout motor is quite within my means. It would be very hard perhaps to make you understand just how I feel about it. Besides, Gerald would not for the world have passed up the chance of a little excitement. “That sounds interesting. A dresser, a washstand, and a clothes press. And turning again, as if the emotions she had churned up kept her on the move, she paced back to the mantel and there stopped, staring at her own reflection in the tarnished mirror.
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